The Beat Goes On
CHICAGO—New religions come and go. There was Tim Leary's League for Spiritual Discovery, artist Ralph Benedict's Christs In Cardboard and more than one variety of Fundamentalist Curtain Sects, as well as the Roman Catholic Church. But one listless young nul-node named Gene Townsend may have finally come up with the true 70's religion.
The Beat Goes On
In The Future, Everybody Will Be Nobody For 15 Minutes
CHICAGO—New religions come and go. There was Tim Leary's League for Spiritual Discovery, artist Ralph Benedict's Christs In Cardboard and more than one variety of Fundamentalist Curtain Sects, as well as the Roman Catholic Church. But one listless young nulnode named Gene Townsend may have finally come up with the true 70's religion.
Townsend's creation, the Church of the Living Apathists, is dedicated to doing absolutely zero. Their bible is an empty spiral notebook. Their cross? "It's a gray rectangle," says the founding vacuum. "It symbolizes nothing." A high priest in their faith would be a person who never turned up for services.
The designing dud feels that their potential is boundless. "If wev call a meeting1, chances are no one will come and that will mean the meeting is successful. Already, I think ten percent of the American people are members. Maybe one hundred percent."
Well listen, window-brain, if you're such a pulsing vacancy in the Universal Duh, why do you bother to spread the word? "I guess you'd have to say I'm not a true believer. I'm a borderline apathist."