THE LORD GIVETH WHILE THE CRAMPS TAKETH AWAY
Just up from the shore of every port city in the English-speaking world, there is a movie house that shows horror films around the clock. Drunken sailors on their last few hours of shore leave stagger into it, over the supine, often unconscious forms of local derelicts, winos and general reprobates, in hopes of being frightened back into something resembling sobriety before they return to their ships.
THE LORD GIVETH WHILE THE CRAMPS TAKETH AWAY
FEATURES
Strychnine Zombies Leave The Swamp
by John Mendelssohn
Just up from the shore of every port city in the English-speaking world, there is a movie house that shows horror films around the clock. Drunken sailors on their last few hours of shore leave stagger into it, over the supine, often unconscious forms of local derelicts, winos and general reprobates, in hopes of being frightened back into something resembling sobriety before they return to their ships. But the movie house rarely gives them their 99 cents’ worth, for its repertoire is invariably cretinous and incompetent to the point of being a great deal less terrifying than gUffawable.
\ If this movie house were a rock ’n’ roll group, it would call itself the Cramps.'