NINE OR TEN UNBELIEVABLY INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT DIRE STRAITS

Part 1: THE ADJECTIVE CRISIS.

Enigmatic. Cinematic. Stark. Sinuous. Thoughtful. Shimmering. Quasi-mythical. Otherworldly. These are only a small sample, but by now you must have read all the adjectives (and adverbs) that describe Dire Straits and/or lead guitarist Mark Knopfler. Unfortunately, it is my sad duty to report that all conceivable adjectives that writers are permitted to use in regard to these musicians have been exhausted! Used up! The limits of the language have been reached. As I wistfully lay aside my thesaurus, then, I am forced, in strict accordance with rock writer's code of ethics (First Law: Whine for more money) to write about Dire Straits in hitherto unknown terms.